Movie Theater Etiquette

So, last night I went and saw the midnight showing of The Other Guys. I personally, hate going to movies anywhere near the time the come out. I hate watching movies in a theater of other people. Even more so when the theater is packed. EVEN MORE SO when I have to sit next to people I dont know.

Here are a list of rules people, in general, should abide by to make EVERYONES experience enjoyable.

1. Silence is still golden. Except in the technology age, its not you talking to the person next to you that makes me want to rip your head off. Its the fact that you answer your cell phone. Youre actually answering your cell phone. I realize(as a mom) that sometimes, you cant always get out of answering your cell phone. But for the love of god, you cant walk into the hallway to do it? And lets be honest, no one that has the audacity to answer the phone whispers. You are brash. Bold. Boardline yelling. Shut the fuck up please.

2. Just because your not talking on your phone, doesnt mean that your texting isnt also irritating. Your bright ass light that keeps going off every three seconds? Yeah, Im not into that.

3. Dont kick the back of my chair. For any reason. Child, teenager, adult. I dont care. Do not kick the back of my chair. If you do not immediately appologize, I will turn around and say something. Vicious.

4. If there is an empty seat next to me...while I appreciate that you are not putting your feet on my chair...but dont put it on the one next to me either. Its disrespectful and I dont want to smell your feet. On that note, as well, dont take your shoes off in the theater. Gross.

5. If you are going to chew sunflower seeds, bring a bag/cup/hand to spit the shells into. Last night, I picked two wet shells off my arm. I nearly punched the guy.

6. I find it absolutely disgusting when selfish parents bring their children into movies that are clearly inappropriate for them. Not only is it irritating to hear your baby/child cry, but there is a reason that these movies are rated R. Dont get my started on children in movie theaters at like, 10 pm...

7. Im all for PDA at the movie theaters. I find it quite hot. But, to pull this off properly, you need to find a movie that has been out for weeks at an odd showing. No one will be there. Have at it. The fact that you elbowed me when you went to straddle your man friend is what had me get you thrown out of the theater.

8. Why the hell would you eat a tuna sandwich at the theater?

I guess Ill get off my soapbox...

Xo,
M

Birth Control. An obviously raunchy post.

I am not the girl that EVER remembers to do something every day. Not good at taking antibiotics or birth control pills. My daughter is the result of missing ONE DAY(I swear!) worth of Yaz. Obviously, if you've been reading my blog, you know that while little boo is my only child, she is not the only time I have been pregnant. And the last time I had to go through the pain of an abortion(more mental then physical) I decided to get aggressive with my bc.

I have been on the pill since I was 17. And about 6 months ago now, I decided to try the ring. I went online to read reviews on it. I read horror stories about how people spiraled into dark depressions. How they lashed out at loved ones. And anal leakage. Ew.

Fortunately, I havent killed myself, anyone around me or had to start wearing diapers. However, I have had some weird side effects. When using the ring, you are instructed to change it once every 3 weeks. Put in a new one and continue the cycle for 3 months. At the end of the three months, you leave it out for a week, having your period. Then, another 3 month cycle.

Holy shit. Heavy-ist period ever. Seriously, I cant believe I stayed alive. Im talking a box of ultra plus tampons in a little over 2 days. I slept. A lot.

Orgasms hurt slightly with the ring in. Granted, they say you can take it out for sex as long as you get it back in in a certain time frame.But that seems counter productive to me. I know it releases hormones into your body, so its not like if I take it out for a few hours, they are going to suddenly disappear. But I had a baby after missing ONE PILL. I'll keep mine in thanks. Its like a small pinch that only lasts for a second. But still. Its weird.

Youre either dry as a desert or wet as a rain forrest. And it always seems to be when you dont need it. Like, 2 nights ago, the first condom broke because I was so dry. We actually had to use lube. Ive never had to use lube in my life. But earlier that day, grocery shopping, it was like a fucking monsoon. I may call my doctor about this side effect actually.

The worst side effect, but far, is the fact that sometimes, it comes out during sex. I dont embarrass easily, but the first time it happened, I was mortified. It looks like a small clear bracelet. Like the ones madonna wore in the 80s. He picked it up from the bed and held it up-he clearly had no idea what it was. "You....dropped this?" Luckily, I was with someone I had been with for a long time, so we were able to laugh it off when I explained it was birth control. And it doesnt always happen. I could deal with it always happening-I probably would take it out during sex. Or it never happening. That would be great. But the constant wondering IF it will happen, is irritating.

So...TMI? :)

WELCOME!!!

My new readers! Joelle and Verity. Im insane, i will fully admit that. But I hope you enjoy reading about it :)

Xo,
Mary

Hello darkness my old friend...

I would say my wardrobe is 80% black. Other colors? Red, White, Blue(in the way of jeans) and hot pink. Oh, and sports apparel. This is ridiculous. I look REALLY good in lime green, but I havent sported it since, like, 6th grade. How did this happen?

This thought, last night, prompted me to order some clothing. Okay, a lot of clothing. 294 dollars worth of clothing. Hmmm...I promised myself that I wasnt going to go nuts until I absolutely couldnt wear the clothing I have now. I live in jeans. But currently, I have exactly TWO pairs that fit. I had to get rid of about 12 pairs because they were all huge. So much so that no belt could save them. I look at my shirts and I hate most of them. I need longer clothing.

So, I got all excited because I can fit into victoria secret clothing. I have been a faithful VS bra buyer since I was 18. 294 dollars later, I should be recieving a shipment of 11 shirts, 1 dress, 1 skirt and 2 sweaters in about 10 days. I need to get rid of Id say about half of my closet. Everything is so big. Cute, and hard to part with, but too big. I hold on to things and say "I can get that tailored. I can get it taken it" But i dont. And I know I wont. Maybe I'll get myself an ebay account and sell some of this stuff. A lot of it has been tried on, but never worn out. And I have a fur coat (From a theme party I threw a couple years ago) taking up space. And shoes! I have a ridiculous amount of shoes. I have learned about myself that I absolutely cant walk in anything over 3 1/2 inch heels. So I have about 16 pairs of shoes that are taking up space and arent being worn.

While I love the convenience and selection of buying things online...once I get them, if they dont fit or I dont like them, I wont return it. And everything looks better on the model.

I probably should have purchased some more pants. I need more pants. Off to find more pants...


I missed you guys :)

Xo,
M

Melting Point.

Ive lost readers. A bunch of readers! Not that I can blame you. Ive been gone for quite some time. Gone and gaining. Sadly. I dont know what happened this summer. My daughter being out of school and me taking on more hours at work maybe. Im sitting at about 221 right now and have been for quite sometime. And it sucks. I have zero motivation and zero willpower when it comes to food. I have fallen back into "Ill start over tomorrow" And tomorrow never comes. *Sigh* Maybe I am just doomed to be fat.

However. I am changing the format of my blog. While, yes, I will still be talking about my battles with weight, Im also going to be chronicling my everyday life. Hopefully that will help me stop bottling things up, which ultimately makes me fall off the wagon.

I hope you are all doing wonderfully and enjoying your summer :)

Xo,
M

Void.

Work is both a breeze and mentally taxing. Its made me more nuturing, and at the same time, vicious. I take care of my grandmother. She is 102 and needs constant care. I love her. A lot. But, its getting harder and harder to remember that she isnt doing things to piss me off. Her body is failing her. For almost 100 years she was able to get around on her own, fix her own meals, bathe alone, use the bathroom. And now, she cant do any of these things. Im frustrated when Im changing her and she HAS to sit down. Before I can wipe her. Which means I have to change the sheets for the second time today. When she yells out for me (usually "Okay!") which is my cue to run upstairs to see if she needs something, my parents and I joke about it. I feel absolutely awful. She is my grandmother. She has never been anything but loving towards us. She has never told me she loves me(shes old school) but showed it in every single thing that she did for us kids growing up. And I am repaying her back that kindness by rolling my eyes when she cant boost herself up from the chair or giggling when she yells for me? What kind of person does that? I am ashamed and disgusted (and crying) as I write this. She cant see and can barely hear, so every activity she used to do(knitting, reading, watching tv, crossword puzzles, cooking,etc) are out of the question. Most days, she just lies in bed, when shes not up to eat. I often wonder how she fills her days. What she thinks about. How she feels. I guess its just as hard to watch her grow older as it is for her to be experiencing it. I will be better to her because she deserves it.

So its hard to be encouraging when inside I feel like such a poor excuse for a human being. I love all my warriors, deep in your own trenches of the weight loss battle. And silently, I pray for you all to find the things you need to help you win this war.

There is a void where my mouth used to be.

Xo,
M

*Deep Breath* Okay. I think I got it.

I may not have found myself, but I found my voice and my confidence.

I ended things with Corey this weekend. For good. Usually, when I have said this in the past, it was coupled with a lot of crying and moping and pining for him. I never knew closure could feel so amazing. Dare I say, Im excited he wont be in my life anymore. I have wasted 8 long years on this guy. And sadly, he is still the terribly immature 16 year old boy I met all those years ago. We exhanged some very harsh words. Mine were of truth. He has a drug habit, which makes me nervous. I told him he has a problem and he needs to get help.

He in turn, raged, full force. He called me a bad mother, a slut and told me that his ex girlfriend(my ex-friend) was right about me, I am just a psycho.

I laughed. I cant believe it. I actually laughed. I laughed because for the first time ever, I wasnt upset with him. Mad nor sad. I felt bad for him. Bad that he couldnt step back and see that I was saying these things out of worry. Bad that he felt like he needed to say those things to me. And bad that all my hoping that deep down he really was an amazing guy, was wrong.

I basically told him there was a reason that all of his friends had become my friends and no one wanted to see him anymore. He was an asshole. He never thinks anything he does is wrong. The people he hangs out with now are druggies. He has exactly two friends left from high school and I know for a fact that one of them is fed up with him.

I wished him nothing but the best and let him know that this would be the last time I spoke to him. I erased his number out of my phone and deleted him from my facebook. Strangely enough, its almost a "no love lost" situation. If I saw him on the street, I feel like I would be very indifferent toward him. I have nothing left to say and no left over feelings.

I feel amazing.

I am 2 weeks away from being exactly 1/2 a year into this weight loss journey, and I am 4 pounds away from being halfway at my goal weight. Its an amazing feeling. To know that I am strong enough to dedicate myself to something and have it pay off is huge.

My brother has lost 6 pounds and my dad is down 8.

Overall, my life is pretty awesome right now.

Except.

Kylie has been sick with pneumonia, which has made her going to school impossible. So Ive been toting her to work. That god that my mom helped me out a lot last week. Thankfully, her meds have made her just well enough to go to school today and tomorrow-her last two days. She has a birthday party to go to which I believe her Auntie Stina will be taking her to(my Bff. Im super lucky!)



I have missed you all. Hope the days have been treating you well!
Xo,
Mary

Milk Carton.

I am lost.

Somewhere in all the chaos that is my life, I went missing. I am actively searching, but have yet to turn up.

I'll see you all when I find myself again.

Xo,
M